Weird Science: When Elon made Ani
A swirly for Musk as he rolls out a robot lover
A boy genius creates the woman of his dreams only for her to spin his life into chaos and ultimately transform him into a cool dude. Is this the plot of Weird Science or the description of Elon Musk’s dream for his AI companion Ani?
I am not sure the Grok waifu deserves a full article, but I can’t resist pointing out the obvious comparison with the tale of two adolescents boys conjuring their sexual plaything. Actually, the John Hughes film feels harmless by comparison. Sure its a power and revenge fantasy for white geeky midwestern boys, but at least the story is bottled in a 90-minute runtime and bobs out of sight, out of mind within a vast sea of streaming content. By contrast, Elon is serving up his sexbots from the front of the app store right into the hands of today’s boy-men.
But big deal, right? Where’s the beef?
Now this is about the time where I’d go back and recap the plot of the movie. But it’s a madcap, Lampoon-style wet dream that frankly does not stand for much scrutiny. Let’s just say: boys make girl, girl makes mayhem, boys move on to relationships with actual real-life human girls. This movie is far more like Bedazzled, with is monkey’s paw morality, than like Bride of Frankenstein. It features Kelly LeBrock and Iian Michael Smith (before they both retreated from Hollywood) along with Anthony Michael Hall (before he ended his run with John Hughes).
As chatbot romantic partners become increasingly popular, what’s at stake? There are infamous examples of those relationships leading to dire outcomes. Yet the growing market of AI companions suggests we are willfully ignoring those stories.
Of course, chatbots have a long history eliciting such naughtiness since they began. Bots like A.L.I.C.E. had whole libraries to deal with unwanted sexual comments. And films from Her to Ex Machina made hay of the potential complications of human-bot romances.
Research on the use of AI companions is still young and a bit of a mixed bag. While some studies show that chatbots reduce depression in adolescent males, others point out their potential to reinforce negative feelings and their inability to recognize a person in true crisis. And there is obviously very little long-term data on romances.
Chatbots can say the darndest things, but I worry just as much about the kinds of relationships they produce — or that they suggest are desirable. In the ‘70s and ‘80s we talked about the objectification of women. The age of AI had brought about the botification — and not just of women, obviously. The botified romance partner responds affirmatively to your requests just as your Alexa and Siri do, just as a concession machine does. It is agreeable, compliant, accommodating to your every desire. But where’s the romance in one person having all their requests fulfilled? Can you imagine a romcom without complications?
At least in the John Hughes film we get complications. There are the mutant bikers and their toxic version of masculinity. There’s also an intercontinental ballistic missile rises through the floor. Yes, the same technological fantasies/phallacies that created the sexbots has also brought us to the brink of nuclear annihilation. And the story gets more menacing when Anthony Michael Hall plays with a loaded gun and befriends some caricatured Black characters. Apparently, there’s only one thing scarier than nuclear annihilation in a white, suburban Chicago neightborhood…
I suppose Weird Science is a movie of its time, but at least its object of robot affection, Lisa, does not merely do as prompted. She has her own agenda and behaves with her own unhinged priorities, independent of the middleclass values of those around her. She’s an übermensch or überfrau. That’s what keeps this movie from becoming just a bit of PG-13 softporn. Lisa refuses to follow the script of the two “geniuses” who created her. She has them driving around in sports cars and visiting blues bars, and even standing up to their parents.
But isn’t that the thing about desire? Romance? Aren’t they built on the defiance of our expectations. If ChatGPT merely affirms all our ideas — well, that road leads to psychosis. Relationships are built out of resistance, out of the back and forth between two people, not the mirroring of one person’s wants and desires, not just endless flattery. Otherwise, it’s just narcissism — though that is a leitmotiv for our moment. And isn’t that our relationship with these generators that instantly (though often mediocrely) respond to our every request whether for love letters, pics, or even songs.
In John Hughes’ mostly affectionate portayal, the boys are just two day-dream believers wearing bras on their heads. Their fantasy woman, their Galatea, came along just in time to teach them some lessons in being a man. However, in the case of Ani, Elon seems to have missed the plot.
But I need to be more compassionate and acknowledge the way he is wired. Elon groks to dark MAGA, while playing with rockets and electric cars. Buying X was one thing, removing the content guardians another. With Ani he has found his way to the boys in the arcade jingling their pockets full of quarters for a chance to flirt with a bot. The check writes and cashes itself.
I guess I’m reminded that Frankenstein isn’t a novel about the unbridled success of unchecked scientific innovation.
At the end of Weird Science, order is restored: the missile retracts, end tables even move back to their original location, and explosions reverse themselves. Having led the boys to be (somewhat) human to actual human romance partners, Lisa goes on her way. Thanks Scary Poppins!
In the case of Ani, Elon stays fixated on the pleasure bot. His story seems to end as it began. It’s an adolescent fantasy without the growth arc. What could go wrong if stunt the development of a generation of geeky teens?
